J.B. Sommerset

I was making some "bomb-ass" steaks on the grill this weekend and I let the T.V. decide what it wanted to show. It's one of those "smart TVs", so it had a good idea of what I like, you know, from all that spying on me. While I was preparing the marinade it started playing something sentimental from my past- because apparently my TV knows me in that way. You know, intimately. Like it watched you grow up, I tell you, these algorithms are out of control. But nonetheless it knew that I wanted some good old 80s nostalgia.   So I am tenderizing the steaks and in the back ground I hear something I haven't heard in far to long. That sound was the sound of a prison escape, followed by and ORV chase on a beach in Oregon, with the police, and the sounds of 7 kids just loving the 80's even though they are about to be kicked out of their homes by the "cheap guy" Troy and his douche bag father. Some of you Gen-Xers know what I am talking about. Some of you k...

That's right, I started " House Of The Dragon " season 2. Let's talk about it, like hard, real hard because it does a whole lot right, especially in todays world where screenwriters and showrunners have completely forgotten how to write a good story and then translate it to the screen. Most modern renditions of my favorite childhood stories are so bad that when I watch them I can smell the sour grape and watermelon vape fumes of the douche-people who wrote them. Because that's the kind of image modern literature and film puts in my head. A douchey one with a whole lot of vape-fumes. What an image, it I could describe it, it would look like this: It's this image of an androgynes guy sitting outside the Star-bucks. He's got whispers of chin hair on his prepubescent jawline, and poorly applied black nail polish on his hands. There's an uncentered man-bun on his head, a snake of ratty coils, unwashed hair that smells of pot smoke. Leaning on his tiny littl...

Every once in a while I see a preview that strikes my science-fiction bone and makes it feel all warm and tingly. There are a couple of things that can do this to me, the first is a story's premise, the second is execution. Sadly, this week I was very, very disappointed. This week I am reviewing that thing we all saw on Netflix, " Atlas ". We all saw it because Netflix put it front and center. It looked okay in the previews, but in our hearts we knew... We knew it was going to suck. We watched it, to be sure, and yup, we were very disappointed.  That's right, I said "Atlas". I watched it so you don't have to. No, really, I mean it. Don't watch this movie if you love science fiction and your health, this will only hurt you in places you can't recover from, like in that tiny sliver of hope, way, way, down in the bottom of your heart.  If you want a really good story about A.I., giant robots, cool gadgets, machine love, and the whole works, you shou...

As promised in my review of Rebel Moon part 1 , I return with a review of Rebel Moon part 2: The Scar giver . So, strap on them Imperium uniforms and prepare for this Space-Viking-cowboy-Nazi-science fiction space opera.  This is the second part, and the thrilling conclusion of Rebel Moon... Wait, what's that, it made too much money, there's going to be a third? Maybe? We don't know yet... um okay. We'll just move forward with this review and cross that bridge when the enemy comes to shoot us all to crap. By now, you might have heard, or at the very least surmised there would be more rebel moons out soon, 4 more if old Zach has anything to do with it. However, I am not so sure the next one, Rebel Moon 3 has been greenlit. There are rumors it has, and also that it will start filming in 2025. If they make it, I will review it. For now, let just focus on Part 2. Don't want to get caught up in the assumption game and get taken out of context. I liked the first one, and...

I really don't know how to feel about this review. I don't know how I feel about the show I just watched, hopefully, this can help sort it out. The fact that it's Amazon that did made this show, somehow makes it worse. Not sure if they are telling us about how they will manage the apocalypse, if they are just providing entertainment at this point, or if we are the entertainment or both... Anyway, here's an honest review of " Fallout ".  That's right, grab your two headed cow, get all your Stem packs together, and finish off that "nuka-cola", then lets ride out into the atomic sunset together- This week I will be reviewing Amazon's " Fallout " series. Buckle up vault-dwellers, strap on yer' pip-boys and enjoy the show. There is something to be said for the story telling and mastery thereof in certain video games, especially those made by old school "Bethesda". Some of the best story telling came from those early years. ...

Since I have been doing the Godzilla thing recently, I thought I'd take advantage of that free subscription my wife has for Apple TV . There are only a couple of reasons to watch Apple TV in my opinion, but ever since I watched " Godzilla Minus One " (read that review here ), I have been craving some more giant lizards stepping on people, stepping on buildings, stepping on other monsters, etc. So I bit the bullet and decided to watch " Monarch: Legacy of Monsters ". And it was "meh", but the good kind of meh. The kind of meh that you might settle in with on a Saturday night and Netflix and chill with- but NEVER tell any one that you did it, and also, that you kind of, sort of, might have gotten a little enjoyment from it. But only just a little bit, not the full fireworks. Before I get started, let me preface this- This isn't even in the same wheel house as Minus One . Expect some speed bumps in the quality, and maybe a gag reflex. Make sure to wr...

I recently finished a Netflix original I thought deserved more credit than it got, even though it got a lot of credit. Usually, most of the shows on streaming services are okay, some are even "meh". Some deserve only the mention of ridicule: Good examples of those include, but are not limited to, " The Wheel of Time " and " The Rings of Power " (based loosely on some stollen material from the works of J.R.R. Tolkien ). Both are decidedly horrid when compared to the books. The latter is more than horrid, I can't express how bad it is, in fact, I just threw up in my mouth a little trying to forget I mentioned it. If you avoid one show in your life, avoid "The Rings of Power", utter fucking trash.  Enough of that negativity! Onward! The show I speak of, the reason I wrote this post, is " The Fall of the House of Usher " based on the works of Edgar Allan Poe . In fact, it's based on one of his short stories, but there is so much mor...

It took me some time, but I finally got around to seeing “ Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny ”, and I have some thoughts about it. First, let me “pretext” the crap out of this. One of the first movies I saw as a kid was “ Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom ”. This set the pace for my movie-going experience. Granted, Temple (as it will be referred to moving forward) isn't the strongest of the entries in the franchise. It does, however, have the honor of being one of the originals. As I said, it's not the strongest, but it carries a ton of fond memories. I watched that tape again and again until it broke. That’s right, VHS, not to date myself. a couple of years later I managed to get a boxed set that also included “ Raiders of the Lost Arc ”, and “ The Last Crusade ”, which incidentally come in as the best in the series, at least in my opinion. For years I waited and wished for another film. By the time Starwars came out with its sequels (“ The Phantom Menace ”, “ Attack o...

When I first saw " Primal " listed on HBO MAX, I didn't realize that it was a  Genndy Tartakovsky  production. If I had, I most likely would have watched it sooner. It's just so damn good. Do yourself a favor, watch it now, here's why... Usually, cartoons don't interest me, so I just pass them by. With the exception: PIXAR . I pay attention to  Pixar  releases because I have a history with them. However, they seem to have gone a little stale over the past few years. What I mean by that is they have found a formula and are sticking to it- make the audience cry. Nonetheless, they still know their craft, but I feel that they have reached a peak. I doubt they will ever come up with another " Wall-E ", or even more poignant, another " Up ". Those risks have been taken, and those stories have been told. The other major animation studios are no different, sometimes they break free of what works and come up with something truly wonderful, but rarel...